To Write Your Heart

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If it were an easy thing to do, to write your heart and express what truly, secretly lies within, we would all be writing. But writing about your heart, your life, your true story, is no easy feat. It is no child’s play. It is courage beyond courage. It is fear, sweat and trembling, but then the words pour out, and you begin to feel that sweet, blissful release.

Sometimes the tears come, sometimes the rage builds, sometimes the memories are too agonizing and the pain amazingly unbearable. But they are nothing compared to the unspeakable joy of sheer relief and potent release that flood through  a person, after it has all been expressed on paper. There is almost no feeling compared to the deliverance from the burdens that have been lifted from the soul, spirit, body and mind, through writing. It is the kind of healing and high that only the one who writes out their trauma and looks it in the eye, writes to let it go and lay it down, can understand.

To write your heart takes inner courage, deeper strength, divine release from dark, heavy memories, that bring depression, pain, suffering, insecurity, fear, again, rages and thoughts of suicide. To write your heart, your story, is a personal release. It brings transformation and transcendence into a greater and better place, not just for you, but for generations to come.

Let this be recorded for future generations, so that a people not yet born will praise the LORD. Psalm 102:18 (NLT)

There is nothing light about writing your heart, your life, your truth, and your story, but it is not impossible. Whether you end up publishing it or not, it is worth doing.

Set yourself free!

ActivateGodsPurposeHere!

Piece By Piece

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Rising above and conquering the defilement, degradation and debasement of abuse, rape and molestation is a monumental task. One feels beaten up and unable to continue on. However, we cannot allow or permit such trauma and tragedy, to get the better of us.

There are millions of us, men, women, boys and girls, who have been raped, sexually molested, and abused, physically, emotionally, verbally and spiritually. Being violated is indescribable. The depth of pain, trauma, filth, shame and guilt that one who has undergone because of even just one of those sickening and debilitating experiences is inexpressible. Putting the life altering damage into words is indefinable. But we can, and we should, dis-empower our trauma, piece by piece, and thrive!

The torture of the memories, the agony of wanting to be able to wash it all away, the pain of trying to cleanse one’s mind, soul and spirit from them, are enough to lead one to all kinds of self-destructing and self-defeating vices. When one has been abused in truth, when abuse is real, one lives with its nauseating existence, wishing that he or she could just wish it away and it would never show its ugly dark head again.  One creates a realm, a self-protective bubble that only he or she can live in, where hopefully, no one can reach and touch and hurt them again, spiritually, emotionally, verbally or physically. It is unhealthy but the abused needs that bubble space to get away, if only for one minute. In our quest to never be or get hurt again, we work hard to ensure that it becomes our emotional fortress and build it to become extremely formidable for anyone to enter.

But at some point for our own sake and for that of others, because we are a part of this world, and the world a part of us, we have to lay it down and walk away from it. It is easier said than done, and I am not sure that the pain ever really goes away, for many of us, but this I do know, that we can create and spread joy, love, healing, piece by piece, for ourselves and for others. It is a decision. A very tough one, but not impossible. Many have found healing through writing, what is your outlet? Is it music, is it writing, is it dancing, is it talking about it? Find your healing, get your healing, piece by piece.

Regardless of what has happened, we can put our lives together again, piece by piece. With quiet determination we can overcome our pain, shame and guilt about something we did not wish for, or bring upon ourselves. It is not our weight to carry. It is not our burden to bear. We must know that, accept that, walk in that, and piece by piece, receive and give back joy, love, peace, kindness, and even healing.

If we do not, we will lose the beautiful purpose our beautiful souls were sent on this Earth to fulfill. Don’t allow the darkness to overwhelm and overtake you. Don’t give the rapist, the violator, the molester and the abuser that kind of power over your beautiful soul and spirit. No, instead, piece by piece, every day, find time to discover your true self, bring him or her out, and live an overcoming life, one that is determinedly and deliberately put back together by your will-power and choice. Breathe and know that you deserve that. You deserve a wholesome life, no matter how battered and shattered you have been.

Conquer your violator. Conquer your molester. Conquer your rapist. Piece by piece. You deserve it. There is a plan for you. A hope and a good future.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

Allow yourself to be put back together again, piece by piece.

ActivateGodsPurposeHere!

Rewrite Your Trauma

 

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I wonder what would happen if instead of living a life of regret, pain, shame and guilt, we decided to write down the beautiful things about ourselves, and focused on living those beautiful things? I wonder what would happen if we walked in the beauty that we see in ourselves, and not shy away from it, but accept it? I wonder what would happen if we came to terms with the truth that we are worth loving and being loved in return?

We are not used up, unwanted scraps. We do not have to be light hidden under a bushel. We are not our trauma. We have a voice, a heart, a spirit, a mind and a soul. We feel. We ache. But we can find the power to rewrite our trauma. You know, as excruciating and painful as it was, we can turn it into a gift to the self and for the world. We can rewrite it so that we glow and our shine radiates and permeates into the lives of others to bring them wholeness as well. We can give others a lifeline to start their lives afresh.

We can stand on the pillars of hope instead of hopelessness. We can stand on the rock of joy instead of depression. We can stand on the mountain of laughter instead of bitterness. We can stand on the anchor of love instead of hatred. And we can stand on the foundation of compassion instead of anger. We can rewrite our trauma by making the free will choice to do so, uplifting and buoying up not just ourselves, but others who are deeply wounded and unbearably hurt. In return, our hearts begin to thaw out, joy begins to flow within us, peace begins to take over, and salvation and deliverance begin to take place.

We transform from our bitterness into our sweetness. We become renewed, fresh droplets of clean water flowing from our souls touching other lives and giving them reason to live on, and not give up. We can do it, so can they! 

Rewrite your trauma. Rewrite your pain. Turn your ordeal into emancipation for yourself and liberation for others. Let that be the story your life, not your trauma. Don’t allow what injured and devastated you to determine who you will become, instead, turn it around, rewrite your trauma, and become who you should be, a wonderful gift to the world.

Should we, must we, we deny the rest of our precious lives the joy of living, being, expressing, birthing and creating? Must we deny ourselves life itself and all the good it has to offer? I think not. Let’s light our lamps, let them shine, so that we can be free and others can be free.

“No one lights a lamp and then hides it or puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where its light can be seen by all who enter the house.”

                                                                                                             Luke 11:33 (NLT)

Rewrite your trauma and let your light shine!

ActivateGodsPurposeHere!

 

 

Broken Record New Song

 

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At some point in our lives, we have to stop asking why. Why did this happen to me? Why me? Why not someone else? Is it the way I look? Did I ask for this? What did I do to deserve this?  Why, why, why, the never ending why record that never stops spinning, over, and over, and over, and over again.  But what if we spun that spinning around? What if we decided to just stop asking why, and got rid of that record for good?

I think that that is a really healthy idea, because obsessively asking why just makes us sicker and sicker, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically. It does not heal us, it does not bring us comfort, it does not grant us liberty or freedom.  It keeps us shut down,unable to function properly, and it pins us down in dungeons of darkness and self-pity, crippling us from becoming the best we can ever be.

Asking the question, why me, continuously, drains and depletes us. It does not bring or give the answers, and the likelihood of our ever finding the answer(s) is zero, to many of our traumatic why me experiences. What does not have to be zero, what should never have to be zero, is the sum of your life, and how you have lived it after your trauma. There is nothing fulfilling or wholesome about why me. There is everything worthwhile in turning that around and claiming, “I deserve better! I can do and be better than what happened to me. I can rise above it!” Let that be your ‘broken’ record. Let that be your new song. Play it, dance to it, until it becomes your reality.

Be grateful for every breath you breathe, for every good door that is opened to you, for every opportunity that comes your way, and for every chance to become the best version of you. Snap out of why me and soar with, it can only get better from now on! You have survived thus far, now give yourself the opportunity to live and to thrive.

Inexplicable why me. There can be so many answers that really lead to nothing. The one constant is that no matter how much you ask that question, it does not erase what happened to you, instead it makes you relive what you no longer want to remember. why me never helped anyone, and it’s not going to start with you. What has helped many is the hope and the determination to begin their lives afresh. Their new beginning has taken them to places they never thought possible, and the same can be for you, if you will only stop dancing to why me.

Stop playing the why me record that leads to a path of self-destruction. Abundance is available. Abundance of life awaits you. Change your tune, switch the record.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I have come that they may have life, and have it in all its fullness.  John 10:10 (Berean Study Bible)

Change that broken why me record to a new song, “I am alive to thrive and I dance to a different tune!”

ActivateGodsPurposeHere!

Write My Love, Write

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Write my love, write.

Write until your hearts sings.

Write until the tears flow.

Write until you hop, skip and jump.

Write until you feel like running to the finish line.

Write until you feel like swimming across a mighty ocean.

Write until you feel like climbing the highest mountain.

Write until you feel the sun on your face.

Write until the burdens fall off.

Write until your mental chains are broken.

Write until your emotional shackles shatter.

Write until you think only life not death.

Write until you sing. Write until you dance.

Write until you rejuvenate and see the light.

Write until revelation kicks in and you find your answers.

Write until you find redemption.

Write until you sway with the words you write, until you are one with them.

Write until your deliverance comes.

Write without restraints.

Write without holding back.

Write, until you soar like the eagle.

Write until you feel like anything is possible.

Write until you are released from your pain and agony.

Write until you discover that your healing and that of others, is not impossible.

Write until it all becomes clear for you and you have a message for the world.

The LORD answered me: Write down this vision; clearly inscribe it on tablets so one may easily read it. Habakkuk 2:2 (Holman Christian Standard Bible)

Yes, write my love, write.

The Replay

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Over, and over and over again. There it goes. The unpleasantness of that memory, causing you to wilt and wither. The thing that turned you into what and who you are today. It’s always triggered by something. Deceptively lying low inside you, as if keeping a low profile, until something happens; a word is said, you smell something, you see something, or you hear something, and it rises to the surface, and you end up replaying and reliving the damage. And you realize, that you are still stuck. You have not overcome it. You have not gotten rid of it. The replay. Always lurking. Always hiding. Always hidden. Waiting to come to the surface.You have to get rid of it, dear friend. You have to end that replay before it ends you.

What caused the replay? What lies beneath that replay? Who lies beneath the replay? What, who brought this replay into your life, your soul, your spirit, your mind, your universe? Have you become comfortable with the replay? Can’t live with it, can’t live without it? Don’t accept that dear friend. Don’t give in to it. I know it is stuck to your soul, but you have to dig it out and let go of it. Otherwise it will constrain you, for all your life.

Look at yourself now. I mean, like, really, now. Now. What do you see? Who do you see? Where are you going? Where is the replay taking you? What is the replay doing for you? Is it enriching you? Is is empowering you? Is it building you up? Is it inspiring you? Is it motivating you? Is it assisting you to fulfill your destiny, your purpose, your dreams?

I think, most likely, in all truth, it is debilitating you. It is withering you bit by bit, making you lose your color, lose your mind. It is draining you day by day. it has probably led you into habits and doing things that you regret; things that further dis-empower you. For how long my friend? For how long? Stop. Stop the replay. Stop it now. Make it go away. Find help, find assistance, or simply write. Whatever you do, don’t let the replay eat you alive. Don’t let the replay deplete, sink and bury you, and deprive you of a fulfilled life.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.  John 10:10 (NIV)

You do have power over the replay!

ActivateGodsPurposeHere!

Merciful Perspective

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What if your healing required you having mercy on the one that caused your pain or trauma? I mean, you having mercy on whoever violated you, hurt you in some form and fashion, or caused and created certain agonizing events in your life? Would you? Could you? Should you? WILL you?

What if instead of hating them, condemning them, you are prompted to show them mercy? What if that would set you free?

What if, for your healing to take place, you had to have mercy on them? Would you continue being justifiably angry, or would you let go and have mercy? 

What if by forgiving them, no matter what they did to you, you forgave them instead of holding on to bitterness, and you become whole again?

What if, by showing them love, (love? Yes!), you are able to experience the power of your uniqueness again?

What if, by showing them compassion, you are able to rebuild your life again?

What if by wishing them well, you are able to bring in beautiful moments into your world?

What if by blessing them, you are able to attract abundance of life into your life?

What if you mercifully tried to see their perspective, and why they did what they did to you?

Nonsensical perspective is it not? Such a hard, painful, almost impossible thing to do.

But in all that nonsense may very well lie your deliverance, healing, gift and purpose.

Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.  Matthew 5:7 (NIV)

If you cannot face them, you can release them, and yourself, on paper. Write it down. You know? And set yourself free!

ActivateGodsPurposeHere!

Trade that Condition

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I am grateful that I am still here, despite my wounds. I am grateful that I am still here in spite of my pain. I am grateful that I am still here regardless of my imperfections. I am grateful that I am still here after much loss. Much loss. Are you?

You know, dear unseen and unknown friend, you could use your wound to open beautiful doors for you and others. You could use your pain as a ticket to love yourself and others.You could use your loss as a ticket to give abundance. You could use your grief to bring brightness and life. You could use your trauma as a ticket to make the world a dark and ugly place for yourself and others. You could use pain as a ticket to make the world a living hell for others. But remember, you can also use it as a stepping stone to bring joy to others. You know and understand what pain is, and you do not wish for others to experience what you have undergone.

Your pain, your wound, your trauma, your grief, are vehicles for deep self-reflection, and decision-making, and you have the power to succumb to returning pain for pain, anger for anger, violence for violence and hatred for hatred. But remember, you also have the power to trade all those destructive conditions for beauty, joy, peace and love. Those insecurities, those hidden secrets that are eating you up from the inside, gnawing at your mind, spirit and soul, you also have power over. You can overcome them, be free, and set others free, with a single change of mind, to drop the weight and unhinge yourself from the sadness, depression, shame and anger, that have become debilitating comfort zones.

Maybe if you never went through what you went through, you will never discover how amazing you truly are. Maybe if what happened to you never happened to you, you will not understand your true value and your true worth. Maybe if you hadn’t had that terrible experience you will never know what a gift you are to the world.

Your pain can be your ticket to uncovering your brilliant self, and what you are really made of! Your moment of tragedy is your ticket to self-evaluation and self-discovery, if you so choose. Maybe if, as horrible, terrible, violent and as traumatic as it was, if it did not happen, you would never realize how much the world needs you, broken up and all, yes, yet still, a balm, honey, love, peace and joy to many, because you understand pain and its depths. Perhaps if you had not undergone that grief you would never be able to see how fragile the world is and how strong you are. 

Think. Think for a minute, despite how crumpled, tired and faceless you feel, the very thing that hurt and still hurts you, could be your ticket to pouring healing power into a very, very, very hurting world. I know it hurts, but your wound is your ticket to knowing your worth and your value. You are more than gold. More than silver. More than diamonds. You are you. Intricately made. Priceless. Don’t hide and waste away.

If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

-Psalm 139:9-14

Trade your condition and thrive! You are wonderful. You are magnificent.

ActivateGodsPurposeHere!

More Resilient Than You Know

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You are more resilient than you know, stronger than you think, or have been made to believe. If you would only look within, you will find that there is power deep within you to tap into. There is power available to you, power that resides inside you, to overcome and conquer sadness, grief, sorrow, depression, suicidal thoughts, and the things that you would rather not remember but are still festering inside you.

You are more resilient than the biases, stigma, stereotypes and boxes you have been placed in by others. You are more resilient than the rape, accident, domestic violence, verbal, emotional, mental and spiritual abuse that you have been subjected to.

You are more resilient than people thinking and believing that nothing good can come out of you. You are more resilient than the heat you are taking. You are more resilient than the circumstances that you have to bear. You are more resilient than the labels that you have been tagged with. You are more resilient than your own mistakes.

Take a minute to stop blaming others, to stop blaming yourself, and to stop blaming life. Look within you and find your resilience. Focus on coming out of the darkness and into the light. Stop making excuses and giving reasons why you can’t, and understand that you can find your resilience, and use it to your advantage to live a wholesome and fulfilling life. You do not have to continue wallowing in self-pity, or on what was done to you, or on how you could have done things differently. Why paralyze yourself? Why keep yourself chained down? I know that the pain is real, but you can beat the pain, or allow yourself to drown. Are you going to give up on you? No!

Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. -Isaiah 40:30-31

Tap into your resilience and excel!

ActivateGodsPurposeHere!

Faithful Instinct

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Our instincts to cope are perfectly normal. However, let’s be honest, some of the paths and habits we choose as coping mechanisms do not benefit us and others around us; loved ones, acquaintances, colleagues or strangers. We hurt ourselves and we end up hurting those around as well. The flip side of that, however, is that we also have to be careful who and what we surround ourselves with as we try to cope with our situation, because they might actually do us more damage than good! What then is the answer?

What are your instincts telling you to do? What is your natural instinct saying to you? If you search deep, it is probably taking you to a place you never knew existed deep within you. That place is your place of beauty, power, and magnificence, where you never realized how awesome you are. In other words, you faithful instinct, which has always been inside you, is telling you that in order to beat, destroy, overpower and overcome whatever it is that you are coping with, you must find the light inside you, even when you don’t see it, even though you may not know or believe that it exists inside you. But it does dear friend, and your faithful instinct has been waiting for you to discover that truth, the splendor that is inherent in you.  Listen to your faithful instinct dear friend; it is the guide, the path, the lamp, to your deliverance, salvation and liberty.

Your faithful instinct knows the good and the loveliness that reside inside you, and it is trying to reveal them to you. Don’t fight it. It is your true friend; your solace, your peace, wisdom, strength and joy. Don’t despise your natural, faithful instinct. There is no science, medicine or philosophy that is wiser or greater or better than your instinct. Your instinct knows you; your depth, your capacity and your power to will to yourself to live a fulfilling life.

Your naturally faithful instinct cannot force you. It will guide you the right way. It knows your nature, it knows you, and respects your freewill, even if it does not agree with your choices. You will hear many voices giving you all the good advice in the world, but at the end of the day, you have to make the decision and determination to follow your faithful natural instinct, to look within and find that light that you carry, and allow yourself to emanate the most glorious part of you, which is your spirit, stronger than your situation, condition, label or diagnosis that you have ever received.

In the thick of the darkness and the depth of loneliness and despair, don’t you sometimes feel that tug to do better for yourself? I am sure you do. Listen to it, before your salvation is too late. In the midst of all the gloom and confusion, don’t you sometimes feel a pull telling you that you can get yourself out of their grip? Don’t you sense a beckoning from within asking you to get past all that has happened and live? I believe you do, the question is, will you listen?

Don’t you feel a resistance somewhere deep within you, wrestling against all the vices, bad thoughts, mental and emotional torment? You do, don’t you? You are wondering where it is coming from, after all you are too weak and vulnerable to resist any bad influence or terrible thought that comes your way. You’ve lived your pain for so long you might as well cave in, right? When you allow yourself to listen, you will hear faithful instinct coaching you on, and sense it buoying you up. You will catch on that it is awakening you to be in tune with your better yourself.

Your faithful instinct within is fighting for you for your dear life. No matter what, it will always be on your side. Follow it; that is the whole point of having one. Embrace it. Let it lead you out of your present darkness, depression, anger, violence, trauma and suicide.

For the Spirit teaches you everything you need to know, and what he teaches is true—it is not a lie. 1 John 2:27

Don’t just cope! Allow your natural faithful instinct to lead you to flourish!

ActivateGodsPurposeHere!